Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Skinning A Squeaker For A Sombrero


Outrage broke out among neighbors who were offended when 40 year old Virginian man Charles Woodson (above) allegedly skinned a guinea pig and made a hat out of its carcass.

For his "unique" sense of style Woodson was charged with animal cruelty, a class 1 misdemeanor, and faces a hefty fine of up to $2500 and 12 months behind bars.

While I do believe this man is potentially a psychopath and do not share his sense of style, the law is discriminating against him. Guinea pigs surely aren't an endangered species, some people consider them quite a delectable dish. People slaughter chickens in their backyard all the time and hunting is considered by many a perfectly acceptable family sport. Deer heads are hung proudly on the walls of lodges and restaurants with few complaints and animal rugs are sex symbols.

Though fur coats are no longer the epitome of high fashion the fur industry is still booming. There was a phase when every teen girl HAD to own a pair of UGG boots or they would inevitably have no friends.
And what about Lady Gaga's meat dress? So this man has to pay just because guinea pig hats weren't in.

Note: I do not condone animal cruelty in any way and I will not compliment your hamster mittens.

7 comments:

  1. This was an interesting article and you did well summarizing it and adding your own commentary. I especially like your disclaimer. It added wit to your article.

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  2. Wow. This was really great. A very entertaining argument. Plus that picture kills me. Photoshop?

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  3. thanks! and nope it was MS paint, I'm old school.

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  4. This news is horrific and sad. I certainly don't condone animal cruelty either, but his treatment was completely unfair. Your examples perfectly illuminate the unjustness of this man's sentence.

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  5. Did the guinea pig belong to anybody? You tend not to see those running wild through Virginia (I think they're native to South America.) Anyway, if the animal was a pet, I'm completely for the charges against him. Ownership of an animal, and the time, money, and love that is invested into it warrants a stiff charge if the animal is wrongfully killed.

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  6. Short, witty, funny...more like hilarious!!! hahahaha and i loooooooooove the pic ;-)

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  7. Nah this dude bought the guinea pig from a local petstore. So when treating the guinea pig as an object of personal property Woodson should have the right to do what he wished with what belonged to him. Unless the animal was tortured or killed in a cruel or unusual way, I dont think it is fair to treat this hat any differently than you would a pair of leather boots; it's not fair to the animal that provided it's hide to the more socially acceptable fashion statement. Though it is tragic that the poor rodent probably never experienced the love an affection It's brothers and sisters most likely will.

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